Computers are shitty without the internet.

I cant think of a single reason someone would want to use one of these without an internet connection. Here I am sitting on the MegaBus which boasts free Wi-Fi and I am Wi-Fi-less. I can’t even post this blog entry until I get somewhere where my computer will connect. I am not blaming the bus, by the way, it could be that my nearly 7 year old laptop will not connect due to obstinance it has developed in ots old age. Did I mention that I am on a bus? When I suggested that I would take the bus to New York instead of driving Bill laughed and when I said I was serious he got very serious and said, “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Jen. You won’t like it. You should take the train.” But the train is expensive and the bus is cheap and I cannot sleep, watch movies, or blog while driving my car. The guy sitting in front of me and now behind me because he’s antsy is apparently a freak. I can’t tell if he’s getting sick or if he’s cold or he’s on meth or what but he cannot stay still. Right now he is kicking his leg so fast I can only see the blur. Dude needs a chill pill or a blanket or rehab. So I am on this bus with this freak headed to New York City (Center of the Universe, sing it girl) for Michael Joosten’s birthday party and SantaCon. Both of these events could be treacherous to my health but are guaranteed to please. I’ve been asked to please not drink too much because I am “bad at hangovers.” I don’t know anyone who is good at hangovers but I certainly do understand what they are saying. I am not as young as I once was and I cannot drink like I once did but in the last year I have found the correct mix for myself. It involves not mixing. I don’t know how my friends are still capable of the kind of debaucherous nights we had in college, some have actually even gotten better at it (Kelli, I’m talking to you). For example, Michael’s birthday party starts at 10:30. PM. That is my bedtime. I am going to have to take a nap during the day in order to make it out that late. That said, last night was karaoke madness and I was out til 2AM but not by choice. It was damn Crotch and Natalie keeping me up til all hours singing loudly. I thought we’d go have a few drinks sing a couple of songs and be in bed by midnight but Nooooo. Every song performed was inspiration for another and at the end of the night we could just keep going up. I did Criminal by Fiona Apple, Santa baby as performed by Eartha Kitt, Black Velvet by Alana Miles, Rehab by Amy Winehouse and Alone by Heart. Crotch opened with Private Dancer by Tina Turner which was a great success then Natalie brought the crowd to its feet with her stirring rendition of If I Could Turn Back Time. All in all it was a successful night.