The Glass is Half Empty

Maybe it's brain chemistry or maybe I'm just an asshole. Even if I really like something I can only talk about what could be better about it. You ask me if I liked a movie I just saw and I could have absolutely loved it but I can only criticize it. I'm sitting here watching American Idol, which I have not really watched at all this season because (shockingly) I'm just not that impressed by the singers, and I would like to know why I can't vote AGAINST people. For example, I like the twitchy rocker kid but I really dislike Hailey and the country singers. Now, you may ask yourself why I don't just vote for the kid with the twitch and the answer is 1 I can't remember his name and 2 you must not have been paying attention when I told you how negative I can be. I don't want to praise someone when I can criticize someone else. Compliments are awkward whereas nasty comments flow so naturally from me. The good thing about this is when you get a compliment from me, you must have done something really extraordinary. Otherwise I would be tearing you a new asshole for your failures as a human being. Sometimes its gets me down that I can't be nicer about things but mostly I'm awesome and everyone else should step it up.